Sage Wisdom

I only have part ownership of this blog. The following is a collaboration between myself and my friends Sam and Stacie. The proceeding list is the product of a evening at Sammy's; the neighborhood bar that promises, "Beer, Pool, and Skeeball." Sadly, there is no skeeball but the atmosphere is nice and the drinks are cheap.
Having the combined age of 80, the three of us feel we have quite a few nuggets of wisdom and insight to share. This list was prepared specifically for a high school senior about to emabrk on her very own collegiate experience.

Being such a good list I thought I might want to share with you our guidelines with no editing or changes

Written on Two Bar Napkins I Present the Following with No Alterations


Sage Wisdom

1) Go on Craigslist for hookers

2) There's always room for champagne

3)Always read Courtney's blog

4) Gene Wilder IS Wily Wonka

5) Watch for body language

6) If wishes were dimes, I'd be a millionaire

7) When all else fails, pick the jew.

8) Always rely on Bel Viv Devoe and James Brown to get a party started (now u know)

9) NEVER TRUST A MANWHO DRINKS FRUITY DRINKS WITH A STRAW

10) Dudes in hoodies ALWAYS have something to prove

11) Girls in pink hats are always surprised-don't trust them

12) When in doubt have another

13) Those who wear sunglasses at night are embarrassed of themselves (except for Corey Hart & Bono).

14) NEVER talk to a man who owns fringe

10) Never get a man's name tattoed on your body

*11) If your friends don't like him neither should you!!!

12) Aspire to band MUSE NOT groupie!!

13) Lee Press on Nails are fun but not to be worn out in public.

14) Hyper color shirts were only good in theory

15) Stay away from men who "pop" their collars.

16) Sometimes 4am Waffle House is the only option

17) Black' N Milds are not cool no matter what you think

18) A guy wearing pink can be hot. Guys that wear pink all the time...well they aren't straight

27) Always pick SLASH (G&R youngun') & LL Cool J licks his lips for a reason

28) always ask to see their license

29) Never believe it when it when someone says "I'm not drunk."

30) Never kissa guy who has the same first name as you.

31) If you don't like them give them a fake phone number or the # of someone you hate

51) Never put cats in a bag or date a guy who wears pooka shells as a necklace

53) A guy who wears fake diamonds is always in debt

54) If he has a woman's name tattoed on himseld he's a tool NO MATTER WHAT

63) A stramp stamp is called so for a reason

66) sometimes the only acceptable nickname is chochise

67) If a guy wants to take you to Havana-go (except if his nickname is cochise)

68) A guy who uses dip will eventually have a hole in his lip

69) If a guy wears more jewelry than you avoid him like the plaque this applies to MAKEUP TOO!!

SAGE WISDOM (PAGE DEAUX) WITH A VENGEANCE

68) Beers on special are the only way to go!

69) No matter how great the guy is your girls are the best!

70) Grand gestures are nice but a guy who does the little things is worth keeping

71) Enjoy your life!!! (Greg says)

72) Always, I mean Always check the left hand ring finger

73) Don't let the fear of falling keep your from jumpiong

74) A man that comes to the door is worth it, if he honks-no matter what-ditch him!

75) A man who starts of calling you baby is always full of it!

76) Don't rush it! Enjoy 18!

77) A man with long fingernails should not be trusted.

78) Always know you are a beautiful special girl who is better than most. Someone who is an inspiration to those much older & maybe not too much wiser.


Hope these little life lessons help you all make it through the day!